Posted by: Corey Folsom | June 9, 2011

Meeting My Woman: Pre-flight Checklist


Before coming together with my woman, I make time for some quiet moments to feel my power and center myself. I want to connect with the feeling that I occupy the masculine role in our relationship. I want to consciously connect with myself in preparation for loving another. To this end I’ve written a “Pre-flight Checklist”.

1) Grounded body

  • Be well-rested.
  • Connected in my physicality.
  • Soft belly.
  • Find truth in my body (not my head).
  • 2) Self-love, sourcing from within.
  • Let my energy body rest in my source.
  • When I feel “triggered” – ground and feel into the truth of my being.

3) Clarity, stillness

  • Pause to gather my energy and priorities. What are my desires from this deep place?
  • Toward this end, mastery with solo meditation practice is key.
  • Stability in myself (powerful, connected) translates as stability in my world.

4) Masculinity

  • Know what I am bringing. Have a plan.
  • Feel my balls. Own the room and make my actions congruent with my arousal.
  • Check the careful, nice guy (guise) at the door. For instance, when she is “bossy” I may physically top her in the moment (pick her up, carry her to the bed or couch, pin her against wall or floor, play with growling, pretend-fighting.) Not as a put-down, but a light adventure, smile and breathe her into openness and love.
  • Feel my impact upon her.

5) Voice

  • Speak truth to myself.
  • Go deep at transitions by speaking to what’s important in those moments.

7) Light heart

  • Keep humor and perspective – help her laugh.
  • Keep a sense of our union as sacrament.

8) Appreciation for her

  • Compliment her. Praise and touch is food.
  • Re-orient to our love. Speak to what it means to be together.
  • Touch her.

9) Willingness and Generosity

  • Check in – ask for an emotional weather report from time to time.
  • She’s the most important person in the room. Period.
  • Give her my love directly when she’s upset! It’s not about pleasing her, rather about opening her with my love.


  1. I love your statement about, “Screw the “nice guise”! yes indeed, Let’s be real and passionate. Women need to be taken sometimes dynamically to break her out of the mind trap and brought back into her playful body. I’m turned on thinking about it! Glad I found your blog I’ll be back.


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